


like the beginning

by seokkwan



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - After College/University, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Holding Hands, Kissing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-06 12:49:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15886398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seokkwan/pseuds/seokkwan
Summary: Seokmin and Seungkwan hadn’t always been a team. In fact, they spent the first semester of Seungkwan's freshman year competing over leads and solos in their school’s choir.(aka Seokmin and Seungkwan throughout different stages of their life as their relationship develops)





	like the beginning

Seokmin stood beside the main doors to the musical hall, wiping the sweat from his palms onto his jeans for what felt like the twentieth time in two minutes. It was his senior year and the casting for his school’s annual musical was to finally be posted. 

He’d been participating in the musicals since his first year at the school, he'd gone through this before, but this was his final time. Standing back and anxiously observing everyone surrounding him, he watched as theatre kids rushed past him from their classes, stopping to wait in front of the bulletin board. His heart rate sped up everytime the doors swung open and someone stepped by, only for him to be met with disappoint when he discovered they weren’t Seungkwan. The crowd was quickly building up, but Seokmin couldn’t convince himself to join the others yet- not without Seungkwan.

Finally, after what had felt like hours, Seungkwan came bursting- rather dramatically- through the doors. He found Seokmin almost immediately, rushing to his side straight away instead of joining the crowd.

“I got here as fast as I could,” Seungkwan braced himself on Seokmin's shoulders, panting heavily as he caught his breath. He looked just about as panicked as Seokmin felt. “Did I miss anything?”

The collective gasp from the group beside them answered his question. Seungkwan’s fingers slipped between Seokmin’s and he barely had time to react before he was being yanked forward. Much to the protest of the others, Seungkwan pushed them through to the front of the crowd. The sheet was merely inches from Seokmin's face, yet he couldn't bring himself to look. Instead he glanced over at Seungkwan and squeezed his hand, his nerves getting the best of him once again. Seungkwan’s lips were slightly parted and eyes wide as he scanned the page for his name. Time almost seemed to slow down as Seokmin watched him.

Only juniors and seniors were considered for the lead roles in the musical. The previous year Seungkwan had waited in front of the crowd with Seokmin in that same place, his hand rubbing Seokmin's back while he anxiously awaited the results. _You've got this_ , he had assured repetitively. And he was right- it was Seokmin’s name at the top of the list that year.

Seokmin and Seungkwan hadn’t always been a team. In fact, they spent the first semester of Seungkwan's freshman year competing over leads and solos in their school’s choir. It wasn't until Jihoon, their fed up peer leader, paired them together for a duet that they were able to work out their differences. They quickly discovered their differences were actually quite complementary to one another. And Jihoon soon realized his mistake of bringing the two together when they showed up to the following choir practice with five duets rehearsed, costumes prepared and complete choreography ready to perform for the group.

But this year was different than the last- they were both up for the same role. He knew the choir had been whispering about it since the beginning of the new year. A part of him worried what this meant, if it would spark old rivalries or if he'd lose his best friend over this. He tried not to think about it.

When Seokmin watched Seungkwan's expression shift as he read the call sheet, his jaw dropping and eyes brightening, he didn't bother looking up at it. Seokmin waited for the pang of jealousy to hit him. But as Seungkwan shook his head in disbelief, moving closer as he read his name over and over again, Seokmin felt his worries disappear. He felt a wave of overall fondless rush over him instead.

He pulled Seungkwan out of the crowd as the students surrounding them began hastily pushing them to the side, eager to read their own results. They didn't say a word as they exited the building and Seokmin wasn't entirely sure where he was leading him. It wasn't until they reached the bleachers outside the school’s field that Seungkwan finally stopped them.

“Look, I know-” Seungkwan dropped Seokmin’s hand, looking away. Seokmin caught the way Seungkwan’s lower lip wobbled, he seemed to be close to tears.

“Congratulations!” Seokmin cut him off, pulling him in close and wrapping his arms around him. He wasn't able to describe the feeling in his chest, he felt like he could almost burst from the excitement. It was overwhelming and unfamiliar and not at all how he expected to feel after losing out on a role. “You did it, Boo!”

“You're not upset?” Seungkwan asked, his tone painted with doubt. He pulled back, resting his hands on Seokmin’s hips as his eyes scanned over his face.

“Of course not.” Seokmin shook his head, smiling as he smoothed his thumb over Seungkwan’s cheek in an attempt to wipe away his frown. “I’m happy for you.”

“Thank you.” Seokmin swore the small smile he gave him in return caused his heart to skip a beat. “God, I feel so stupid now.” He ducked his head as he laughed nervously.

“Why?” Seokmin asked, tilting his head as he watched him closely.

“I just-” Seungkwan dropped his hands from Seokmin’s waist, moving them to smooth his hair down before continuing. “I don’t know, I just was worried. I wasn’t sure what the results were going to be- and if we were going to be okay with them.”

“I’m okay with them.” Seokmin smiled reassuringly. “I was the lead last year, you deserve this.”

“You’re too good.” Seungkwan wrapped his arms around him again. “Seriously, I’m not sure how I’d be reacting if this was the other way around.” He laughed, burying his face in the crook of Seokmin’s neck.

“I don’t want to spend my last year in a fight with my best friend.” Seokmin rested his cheek against Seungkwan’s head as he held him close.

“Aw, I’m your best friend.” Seungkwan teased, poking him in the side as they broke apart again. “Does my best friend want to skip third period and buy me a coffee to celebrate?” He grabbed Seokmin’s hand, smiling back at him as he lead him away from the school. Seokmin didn’t think a single coffee was congratulation enough, but for now, he thought, it would do.

 

\--

 

Seokmin’s going away party was the night before he was supposed to move- which he discovered was a major mistake when he woke up the next morning with a hangover, unable to face the day without sunglasses and a few pit stops on the way to his new dorm, much to his parents’ disappointment. In his defense it was his first hangover, although it was certainly not going to be his last. He found himself at Seungkwan’s side most of the night, something Jihoon had teased him about whenever Seungkwan left for the bathroom or to grab another drink, telling him he looked like a lost puppy.

He did feel like a lost puppy his first week of university. It didn’t feel right roaming the campus of a school without Seungkwan by his side, after he’d grown so used to it over the previous three years. They had promised to keep in contact the night of Seokmin’s party, but he soon found that promise wasn’t as easy to keep with his as workload and responsibilities from the clubs he’d joined quickly caught up to him. And when the next year’s musical was announced and Seungkwan discovered he was had received the leading role again, it was nearly impossible to line up their schedules. There was a part of Seokmin that was worried things wouldn’t be the same when he moved back home for the summer. Seungkwan had been spending more time with his other friends, Seokmin had made new friends. Maybe it had been too long.

But the day after moving home from residence, after being woken up to pounding on his front door at 11am and being forced to stumbled down the stairs in only his boxers and an oversized t-shirt, he realized that worry was all for nothing.

“You idiot!” Seokmin was greeted with a smack to his chest before Seungkwan let himself in. “Why didn’t you tell me you were back? I had to find out from your sister at the grocery store, unbelievable.”

“Sorry.” Seokmin mumbled rubbing his chest and closing the front door before following behind Seungkwan into his kitchen. “I was going to text you when I woke up.”

“You should have texted me before you left.” Seungkwan grabbed a box of cereal from his cupboard as he continued to nag him.

Seokmin watched him from the entryway as he navigated his way through his kitchen, still remembering exactly where all the silverware and bowls were kept. And in that moment everything that he feared had disappeared between them over the school year seemed to fall so easily back into place.

 

\--

 

Seungkwan’s school was relatively close to Seokmin’s, which meant they hadn’t fallen out of contact like the previous year. It also meant Seokmin had a harder time moving on again. In his first year he’d met people at parties, even dated very briefly, but now with Seungkwan at those same parties or texting him to make plans every week, it was hard to pay any real attention to new people he’d meet. After a little over a year, Seokmin finally worked up the courage to ask him on a date.

“A real date,” his roommate Mingyu had pleaded with him. “No more just having him over for pizza and a movie. How is he supposed to know it’s a date if you’re just doing the exact same thing you did when you’d hangout in high school?”

“But I paid for the pizza and we shared a blanket!” Seokmin argued. “And we like pizza and movies.”

Mingyu sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “But he doesn’t know that it’s any different than normal.”

“I don’t know what to do,” Seokmin whined, throwing his head back against their couch. “Can you just ask him if he likes me?”

The blank expression, with just the smallest hint of disappointment, Mingyu stared back at him with was all he needed in response.

Two weeks later Seokmin found himself standing outside of a restaurant, somewhere trendy where Mingyu took all his dates, waiting for Seungkwan. To avoid looking too eager, he glanced over at the menu posted on the wall outside, grimincing to himself as he noticed the prices. He fidgeted with the cuffs of the blazer Mingyu put him in and considered if he still had enough time to throw it in his car and pretend he never wore it to begin with. Though just as he turned to head towards his car, he found Seungkwan waving to him from the opposite side of the street. He could feel his nerves already beginning to calm as he waved back to Seungkwan- he couldn’t imagine there ever being a time he wasn’t excited to see him.

“You look so handsome,” Seungkwan cooed, looping his arm through Seokmin’s as they walked towards the restaurant. “I’m guessing Mingyu dressed you.”

He could feel Seungkwan smiling up at him in a teasing manner, but he couldn’t convince himself to look back, instead opting to duck his head as he returned the smile. As they waited for the hostess to bring them to their table, Seokmin tried to convince himself to return the compliment. But after Seungkwan had stepped forward to let the restaurant know their reservation, he’d mistakenly taken a peak at his outfit- and noticed just how well Seungkwan’s ass filled out his pants- and he was finding it even harder to speak. Claiming he was good at first dates would be a far stretch from the truth, but his past experiences were suddenly not looking too bad. 

A couple drinks later and Seungkwan suggesting they split something to eat after looking over the prices himself, Seokmin finally relaxed.

“Do you want to come over?” Seokmin asked as he climbed into his car after they left the restaurant. “I’m sure the new episode of that drama you’ve been watching is online somewhere by now.”

“Ah, I don’t know about that.” Seungkwan shook his head as he sat down. “I don’t put out on the first date.”

“Oh!” Seokmin froze with his seatbelt in his hand as his eyes widened and face turned a deep shade of red. “I didn’t- I just meant hangout- I’m sorry!”

“Seok,” Seungkwan placed his hands over his face and Seokmin quickly realized his shoulders were shaking from laughter. “I’m just teasing you.” Seungkwan placed his hand over his, which was still frozen in place holding his seatbelt.

“Oh.” Seokmin forced out a laugh as he nodded. “Yeah, I know.”

“Why are you so nervous? It’s just me.”

Seokmin squeezed his eyes shut as he felt them begin to sting. He didn’t have a real answer to the question. Seungkwan knew it was a date, he made that pretty clear when he’d asked him, yet Seokmin still couldn’t relax. All he could think about was confessing, he’d waited so long for just a simple date and now that it had happened, he didn’t want to hold back anymore.

“I love you,” Seokmin blurted out, too afraid to open his eyes after his sudden confession. “I asked you out because I’m in love with you.” He choked on his last few words, unable to hold back the tears that slipped down his cheeks.

“Seokmin,” Seungkwan replied softly, shifting in his seat before resting his hands on Seokmin’s cheeks, gently wiping away his tears. “Open your eyes.”

Seungkwan was closer than he expected, so close he was practically in his lap.

“I agreed to go out with you, right? And I’ve been spending nearly every weekend with you watching bad movies since I started university, right?” Seokmin nodded, still avoiding eye contact. “You don’t need to be so shy around me, it’s weird.” Seungkwan smacked his chest lightly, finally causing a small smile out of Seokmin.

“I was so scared of saying something dumb,” Seokmin sighed, taking a deep breath. “But I guess that’s out of the way now.”

 

\--

 

Seokmin threaded his fingers between Seungkwan’s as he joined him under the blankets on his couch. The feelings of doubt and anxiety that seemed as if they were going to crush him a few weeks prior no longer lingered while he was in Seungkwan’s presence. He didn’t even bother to fight the smile that quickly formed as they make eye contact, a smile that Seungkwan quickly returned.

“You’re so cute.” Seungkwan patted Seokmin’s cheek before giving him a quick peck on his lips. Seokmin chased his mouth as he pulled away, placing the laptop to the side so he could get closer. “What movie did you pick out?” Seungkwan laughed as he broke away, smoothing his thumb over Seokmin’s cheek.

“Can we skip the movie?” Seokmin asked, his eyes still locked on Seungkwan’s lips as he placed his hands on Seungkwan’s hips as an attempt to encourage him to climb into his lap. “I’m not going to be able to focus anyway.”

“You’re too impatient,” Seungkwan laughed, turning as he moved to straddle Seokmin’s lap. “We only have twenty minutes before the pizza gets here.”

The words went completely over Seokmin’s head as his eyes trailed along Seungkwan’s body, he reached up to drag his hands down Seungkwan’s chest before they landed on his hips yet again. His tongue quickly darted over his lips as he watched Seungkwan lean in towards him. He wasted no time meeting him halfway when Seungkwan placed his hands on his shoulders. Ever since that night in Seokmin’s car, he found any moment he wasn’t kissing Seungkwan, he was just counting down the hours until he could pull him back into his arms again. Mingyu told him it was the honeymoon phase that made him feel this way- he’d been fantasizing being with Seungkwan for years and now he no longer had to wait anymore- but Seokmin couldn’t imagine that feeling ever fading. Being with Seungkwan was just different, in the absolute best possible way. Considering the chemistry they had in their duets and their bits and banter, Seokmin knew he shouldn’t have been so surprised to find out just how well they worked together in yet another aspect.

Seungkwan leaped off his lap before Seokmin even registered the knock on his apartment door. He watched as Seungkwan took a deep breath and smoothed down his hair, giving Seokmin a quick smirk before turning to meet the delivery person at the door. Maybe Seungkwan would be just as big of a fan of cold pizza as Seokmin felt he was in that moment.

 

\--

 

They’ve both finished university and found themselves sitting in the bleachers of their old high school- it was pitch black save for the security lights on the school doors over thirty feet away from them and neither of them were entirely sober after sneaking away from Seokmin’s parents’ anniversary party.

“You know-” Seungkwan broke out into giggles that Seokmin joined him in while he nodded for him to continue. “I think I may have fallen in love with you out here.”

The smile on Seokmin’s face was quickly replaced as he stared back at him in shock. “What?” He nearly shouted.

Seungkwan continued to giggle. “Do you remember your senior year? When I got the lead for the musical.” Seokmin nodded. “You weren’t mad- I was so afraid you’d hate me after I read my name on that list. But it didn’t even seem like you were faking it for my sake.”

“You were so perfect for that role.” Seokmin moved in closer, pulling Seungkwan’s hands into his lap from where they were fidgeting in his own. “And I could never hate you.”

“I know that now.” Seungkwan smiled warmly at him before ducking his head and pausing for a moment. “I definitely didn’t realize it was love I felt for you in that moment, but it was. I love you, Seokmin.”

“I love you too.” Seokmin squeezed his hands, watching Seungkwan as he chewed on his lips.

“That’s why I wanted to take you here for this.” Seungkwan closed his eyes and took a deep breath before pulling one of his hands back and shoving it in his coat pocket. Seokmin felt his eyes begin to sting and heart beat rapidly against his chest yet he wasn’t entirely sure what was causing him to feel so on edge. He found himself unable to keep his eyes off Seungkwan fidgeting around in his pocket.

“Lee Seokmin, look at me,” he laughed, leaning in closer to make eye contact again. “Wait how are you already crying? I haven’t even said anything yet.”

“I don’t know.” Seokmin shook his head. “I just love you.”

Seungkwan removed his other hand from Seokmin’s lap and wiped away the first tear that fell down Seokmin’s cheek. “Will you marry me?”

“Yes,” Seokmin barely managed to choke out before he could no longer hold back the flood of tears that followed. He buried his face in Seungkwan’s neck when he pulled him in.

After a few minutes Seungkwan pulled back again, brushing away his own tears. “Maybe I should have done this while we were sober.”

“I still would have cried anyway.” Seokmin sniffled, smiling back at him. “Can I see my ring? It’s a ring in your pocket, right?”

“So impatient.” Seungkwan sighed, leaning in to give him one quick kiss before pulling the small black box out of his pocket.

And, just like everything else always was with Seungkwan, it was a perfect fit.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading, i'm @sunshinedokyeom on twitter!! and an extra giant thank you to ao3 user soonhan for editing this & helping with the title!


End file.
